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Sit Down Pon De Cocki by Sonyae
OK . This review will be shorter than usual . Reason being is because there isn't much to say about the song but talk about how bad it is , how much it didn't make sense and ending it off with 85 paragraphs full of me bitching about stereotypes . So today , I'm cutting straight to the chase . Sonyae dear : no . I understand you have some Trinidadian in your blood and all , and you look like you have more than enough gluteus maximus to back it up on any fine sir you feel is worthy of your body , but this ? This is not working for you . You better not include any of this rubbish on your album because I swear I will see to it that all of America has a bonfire and burns nothing but that damned record .
Alright , on with our lives . I know that many of you , like I , were confused as Sonyae did the utmost with pushing the reggae factor into her song . So I had to ask around and report my findings back to you all . As in "around" , I mean I just asked Nina since she's the streetest person I know . She knew what it meant and she gladly told me . Only problem was she just translated it from rip off Jamaican to straight outta Compton slang . So I asked Airemese what Nina was talking about and she translated it from straight outta Compton slang to wannabe hood . After while , I just gave up realizing that my 22-year-old daughter knows as much American slang as I do and probably uses it less . I decided to woman up and figure these lyrics out myself . Hell , I'm smart ! So I got out my pen , got to searching on urbandictionary.com and rewrote these bad boys ! It took me a few weeks to do this but trust me , I got this down pack . (Really it only took me 5 minutes to write . Majority of the time was spent trying to figure out what the fuck she was talking about .)
Hi there young fellow , so I heard around here that you like girls who are loose , but as in the sense 'willing to give it up' and not girls who are in dire need of vaginal rejuvenation
Just wondering if what I heard was true
Are you saying you like girls like that ?
Then sir you found your perfect match ! (OMFGHFTREYSAJA , it actually rhymed ..)
You like it when I go cowgirl on your willy (O.o)
You like it when I get groovy on your willy (0.O)
You love it when I sit down upon your willy , sit down upon your willy (O.O)
You love it when I sit down upon your willy , sit down upon your willy (X_X)
NOPE NOPE . GET YOUR FUCKING LYRICS FROM ELSEWHERE . I AM DONE .
... with the hook .
Despite the fact we just had intercourse , I think NOW would be a great time to take me out and learn my name
It would be nice if you took me somewhere worthwhile , but at this point I'm sure I'd settle for McDonald's
'Case you know , being a slut<food and all the top notch stuff , seeing how I just totally neglected my own request with more talk about sex
Because you sir are mine !(Pretty much the line that made the most sense in the whole song)
You like it when I go cowgirl on your willy
You like it when I get groovy on your willy
You love it when I sit down upon your willy , sit down upon your willy
You love it when I sit down upon your willy , sit down upon your willy
OK , so apparently I love you and not just your dick
... SIKE !
[Insert more sex references]
You like it when I go cowgirl on your willy
You like it when I get groovy on your willy
You love it when I sit down upon your willy , sit down upon your willy
You love it when I sit down upon your willy , sit down upon your willyWELP , THERE GOES MY SONG WRITING CAREER .
Sit Down Pon Di Cocki
In My Eyes : 0
In The Public's Eyes : ★★ ( Because even I felt the riddim deep in my hip bones ... well , what's left of them )
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