Dallas laughs again when Erica says that she thought he only had one name. He had become very aware of her during her stint on Big Brother, when Dallas watched religiously, but he was never sure if she was really like that. But it turns out she actually was. "Hi Erica," he says with a smile when she introduces herself. "No I definitely have two names," he grins. "Got them both at birth.....as it goes." Dallas watches her as she tries to work out what he was talking about. This little ball of energy fascinated him. "Ohhh....woah...no not sex," he laughs. When she holds her hand out, Dallas looks down. "Sugar?" he asks. "Are you actually on a sugar high?" he adds, finding the mere notion hilarious.

Dallas nods and shrugs, trying to look like the lack of names was something that upset him. "I know, right? Sometimes I think the birth certificate shop was charging by the letter," he jokes. "Three? Well someone's spoiled, ain't they?" Dallas says with a little wink. "This tour has me as Juneau. I swear no one knows who I am," he laughs. "I thought as much. You both look like the sort of ladies who would never indulge in such....naughty experiences," he laughs with her. Erica's happiness was infectious. He looks down at the sugar in her hand again. "Oh....Oh! Is there acid in it?" He takes one. That's one thing I don't have in my bag," he laughs, patting his pocket as he tosses the cube into his mouth.

erica giggles,covering her face. she couldnt help but feel the giggle made her face very red. " i think i need a 4th name. hitomi kobayashi is known as a bitch. erica hess is known as a crazy,and erica kobayashi is getting constrictive.i think i want something like lady weatherby von donderton. it sounds super classy. " she gives a wise nod. "you have to watch those birth certificate people. they will charge you for letters you dont get. they shorted my sister a middle name." she gives a little shrug. her sister had left the tour to do her own thing,and erica did miss her a little. " do people call you "juneau"? i bet trent reznor has people calling him nine inch nails all the time. did you bring the hamster ball? maybe that is throwing people off." erica offers helpfully. she loved the idea of rolling over people in a plastic ball. but was thoroughly concerned with farts. "just like you and dustyn. we are good people,right?" erica cackles,giving dallas a wink. she didnt know for sure,but assumed they had been intimate. "oooh" erica says,widening her eyes. "whats in the sack,jack?" she asks like a little kid. when dallas takes the acid,erica's eyes go even wider. she wasnt sure of dallas' tolerance,but this wasnt kids stuff. " um..you know the phrase,dont take the brown acid.....this is the brown acid."

Erica usually hated when anyone implied anything stereotypically Japanese about her. Dallas made it cute and fun,and Erica was all about cute and fun. She giggles and strikes her best power ranger pose. "Super mega Erica squad,move out! " she wraps her arm around dallas' " you can be the sidekick who steals the show with snappy one liners....can you make your nose bleed on command? " she adds this in her typical rapid fire way,already treating Dallas as a treasured friend. Erica sticks her tongue out and shakes her head. "Nooo,not jeff! There is nothing to respect about Jeff foxworthy or Dunham. Jeff Dunham fucks up ventriloqual figures. Those rock by default usually....um....how about....Rick? Ricks are always badasses.fast cars,action sequences,mullets. Rick punchmore. Yes,this could work." Erica squeals,taking hold of dallas' hand with both of hers and hopping up and down. This surely looks strange to any one paying attention to them. "Mariko will be back,I think she had to get her freak on." Erica answers off handedly. If mariko was around,she would just die at Erica divulging that.she was intensely private at times. She doubles overlaughing when Dallas does his girls screaming for kellin impression. The combo of beard and teenage girl scream is too much for Erica to contain her laughter. " you think you can get me a chance to meet kellin? Oh my god,kellin!" She jokes,doing some screeching of her own. " poor dally, kellin is stealing your thunder. I mean c'mon, does he even beard? I'd love to join you guys! I'd just die! A cover? Original? Make it up as we go?" She says happily. Honestly she had lost much of her interest in music after her daughter came to be. Some of it was still a self imposed punishment,some was feeling she couldn't be a mother and a musician. But this tour had reignited her furnace. " Coke and speed,huh? " She asks,still eyeing the pocket. " combine that with the acid and we'll have a three day long Benny hill chase scene." She giggles,and ins" yakity sax".

Erica cracks up when Dallas joins her. People were either really drawn,or really repelled by her upbeat way. Luckily,most were the former. " super mega Erica squad and seth... yes,Seth works great! " she grins,before lightly punching his arm. " I can't make your nose bleed,you silly goose. I know you like them more....Manny....unless Nina has been right all these years! " Erica giggles and wipes her own nose. Holding up her hand with imaginary blood on it. " though,honestly I've never understood that whole nosebleed thing." She lets Dallas ramble,with a knowing smile on her face. She know the acid was strong. She herself hadn't even taken any yet. She was a little scared of it. She takes a sugar cube of her own and gulps it down,feeling bad for letting Dallas go first,she eats a second one. "Mariko has awesome hair. She got the pretty hair out of us. " Erica says with squished cheeks. She loved the feeling squished. It made her feel like a dog toy. " keeping has a helmet?! Does he have a skull under it,or is it just exposed brain?" Erica asks inquisitivEly. She was running on natural silliness before the acid kicked in. Sure,there was some weed bouncing around inside her,but that was just normal stuff. " coke......yeah lets do it! Real rock and roll stuff. How much do you have? We could fill up the hamster ball and just breathe it in as we roll. We could roll over Adam black. He is an asshole."

"wow,you got this anime thing down,huh? secret masturbation powers? though i do like the outfit. i'll have to tart it up and get all skimpy with my clothing. cropped tops,tiny skirts and white panties. my power will come from hello kitty merchandise,naturally." erica laughs hard,the idea of her ever running around in skimpy clothing was absurd. dallas was instantly her favorite person on the tour,that she wasnt currently or previously having sex with. "oh you know nina,my ultra posh guitar player,she's always goofing on me looking like a man. a feminine man,but still a man. only she can kid about this.anyone else? id punch square in the cock.if it i was a girl? id staple a dildo to her,then punch it." she says with a grin. she and nina had a relationship that could be thought of as cruel to outsiders,but it was always done in fun. erica smiles when dallas leans on her and talks about mariko.erica loved that mariko was thought of favorably by fellow musicans. she sometimes felt a little bad for being the more well known of the sisters,but mariko was well on her way. erica pats dallas' head. he was taller than she pictured. for some reason,she always pictured him like dustyn sized. " microwave is bad for you,dally. all that radiation seeping into the food. it will drain your essential fluids. that is what that dr strangelove movie was trying to warn us about. but man, a peel back skull with some chef boyardee spaghetti and meatballs would be soooo good. get the fuck outta here with that spaghetti os bullshit. that stuff is for Guantanamo bay prisoners. not people like you and me." erica says,starting to ramble more. her take on the acid was slower,as she was trying to ignore the little vibrations coming off of everything. she couldnt ignore the connections things started to have and that people around them were starting to look more and more like rat fink characters. "yes,lets kick that sack until the round bits pop out. but cute like,you know? i dont mind being called a lesbian,but i hate the d word." she says while dipping her key into the bag and taking a bump for each nostril. "bumper boats! we need bumper boats,dear dallas." she says suddenly. with takara safely at home,she was planning on giving herself in to all the drug trouble they could find.

erica kobayashi

interviewer

interviewer: edith and i had some time on our rv tour of america to catch this thing called the warp tour? i dunno. its probably hip with the kids. anyway,edith and i have a VERY popular newsletter at the bingo hall.so we thought we'd flag down one of the performers and see what they had to say. we caught this tiny woman's show and it was rather.....interesting. say.whats your name,little girl?

erica: erica kobayashi!..wait,you arent going to ask me to sit on your lap,are you?

interviwer: noooo. edith and i quit swinging in the 70's. she got the clap something powerful and we learned our lesson.

erica:eeew. that happened to a friend of mine once.poor thing had to wear one of those cone things around her neck like a fucking dog or something.

interviewer: her neck....why not her waist?

erica: have you seen waist cones? no. dont be silly,they only make neck ones.

interviwer: for dogs...not people.

erica: your mom is not people!

interviewer: that in rather uncalled for.

erica:unlike your mom. she is a famous whore and does not charge all that much.


interviewer:i'll have to write THAT one down. how has this tour been so far?

erica: pretty ok. i mean,i havent gotten into any death struggles with any of my tourmates,but there is always tomorrow.everyone seems kinda quiet really. except for juneau. dallas,but i call him juneau. its a thing we have. sometimes he calls me little buddy,and i call him skipper. we then spend hours pretending we are on gilligans island,but gilligans island after the apocalypse. to keep it cute,you know.

interviewer: i assume there are drugs a plenty here?

erica:get your own,pops. you didnt put in on this. ass cash or grass. nobody rides for free.

interviewer: i have that sticker on my rv.

erica: *shudders*

interviewer: edith says you are one of those lesbians and that your girlfriend is also on the tour?

erica: lesbian is too restrictive. im not homo or hetero. im all sexual,baby. but i do have a girlfriend and yes she is on the tour. she is headlining.

interviewer: and you are just an opener? in spite of being older,more established and generally well known? that has to be hard. edith never has forgiven me after i beat her in Parcheesi.

erica:i do not even think about it,really. vile hour deserves all of their fame and what not. i dont have that rock and roll ego that needs to be fed. im comfortable where i am.

interviewer: even though people say you are are just a groupie?

erica: i am not! people want to put others into little compartments. i am tiny,but i will not be put into tupperware! coleykins and i keep our sets separate. we dont want to be all "oooh,look at us. smooch smooch smooch." not that she doesnt give the BEST kisses.but people dont want to see that on stage. besides,i get enough of the "you guys are so brave for touring together. " brave? what is this,schindlers fucking list? everything doesnt have to be a statement.

interviewer: you are much angrier than i thought you would be.

erica:oh..i am sorry. i really want to seem cute and fun.

interviewer: i am not so sure. edith was touchy before the change....are you going through the change?

erica: no!!! japanese women do not hit that till like age 220. we are straight fucking until the end.

interviewer: i hear you are usually with a band called the harlots...why are you solo now? did you break up?

erica:no! its basically the harlots now. see, my guitarist and bestie,nina sangria is married to vile hour's dreamy drummer. castor drake. whom,if nina and nichole werent in the picture...yeah,i would totally hit that. but that is neither here nor there. i was approached by people running this thing to join. but i didnt want to put nina in a spot and ask her to abandon her husband and daughter for a months. turns out nichole and vile hour were also appearing,so nina is here anyways. chloe was already drumming for me,so ...yeah. its the harlots.

interviewer: are you sure you guys arent swingers?

erica: positive. we are all very close.that is it.

interviewer: your set has been rather...unpredictable in format. any reason as to why?

erica: yes. lots and lots of drugs.mind altering drugs that your mother warned you about. on any given night you will see either ...normal harlots punk rocky stuff. me and my sister mariko doing a set that is styled like her usual. you know,blood and theatrics. or me,mariko and nina in a very andrews sisters like inspired set. all three are well received. i like to keep people on their toes. festivals like this are supposed to be fun. and i am all about the fun.

interviewer: your sister mariko?

erica: yes. warp tour is your only chance to see us perform together.this isnt just blowing smoke up your ass in order to get you to come out. my sister and i operate very separately. but we figured we would give the people a treat for warped.

interviewer: how about you and vile hour? any collaborations to look forward to there?

erica: nah. nichole and i just do totally different things. oh she is punk as fuck,but doesnt need to prove it by three chords played fast. she is a fucking artist. i am too,but it would be like andy warhol working with ed roth. it just wouldnt work. now if you excuse me,i have to go puke. these shrooms are wrecking havok on my tender tummy.

A smog blasting, beat up van pulls up; Police Code had arrived in Sin City. They one-by-one pull out of the van. Erica approaches Nichole. "This is the venue right?"

Nichole was staring at her cigarette, watching the tip burn, drifting in and out of daydreaming when the Police Code group approached her. She looks up at them and gives them a small smile. "Yep. What was it that gave it away? The people or all the tour buses?" She answers jokingly, taking a long drag.

"Uh, I don't have any stogies. I have cigarettes," Nichole says back with a small laugh, handing her the box. She hated the term 'stogie' for cigarette.