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Offline DistortedAudio  
#1 Posted : 04 August 2011 10:31:09(UTC)
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"So what did they say?"

"I have a nice amount of time left. Enough to finish off my checklist of things to do."

"Oh."

The awkward silence between Renee and Gary as their small white Sedan drove through Anchorage was one that both wished would end. Renee took the initiative.

"So we finishing the EP?"

"It's on the checklist."

"What else is on the checklist."

"Things."

Renee nodded, in a frustrated manner but nodded all the same.

"You know when I was a boy..." Gary started as he peered out of his window, quietly watching life pass by through the glass, "I used to hate these windows. They keep us from each other, all of locked in isolation, in tiny little worlds. I think that's why I liked it when we were Gears, just Gears. When we were Gears, we played at those small venues, the ones without stages, where we could be side by side with people. I don't like it how we are now, it feels too...distant."

Renee could only shrug and another minute passed by quietly. She broke it once more, "Total Annihilation is coming up, you playing that set?"

"On the checklist."

She nodded solemnly once more, annoyed at the barely conclusive answers.

---

The sounds of a traditional DJENT riff filled the recording studio at "THE HOUSE THAT METAL BUILT"(HTMB). Winston Marsh had been practicing this riff even since he had began practicing for TA IV.

On the other side of the glass sat Greggory Marsh, who was busy reading a flier that had been stapled around the town. It read: "NEED A NEW VOCALIST, GEARS OF BREMEN". The only prerequisites were that the vocalist must have residency in Alaska and could play guitar. "I find it kind of strange that he didn't ask me to take his spot."

"You have residency here, just audition." Winston replied to his brother has he tuned his new guitar. The seven strings were necessary for his new sound.

"Yeah, well it's going to be lame. I already had to audition once to get in this band and it's only a 'temporary membership'. I barely even have personnel credits on the album."

"Calm down, it'll all pan out. Seriously though, check out this riff." He began to play the intro to Between the Buried and Me's 'Aesthetic'.

His brother nodded calmly, "Sounds OK."

---

"So Festival de Musica, must be nice to have such a nice show."

"No serious conversations until you get your pants back on."

"Fair enough."

Paul Glover pulled on his jeans as he looked back at Laura Paige, his girlfriend for three months.

"I'm gonna use your kitchen for a bit."

Laura shrugged, she didn't care much for anything except for:

"When are you going to introduce me to the rest of your band?"

"We've been over this Laura, I'd rather have a private relationship. You tell a few people, then the tabloids know, then the world knows and we'll be like MattY and Cherise."

"Who knows what we'll be like, for all you know we could be the next Brandon and Hannah."

Paul returned to the bed and looked into his girlfriend's eyes.

"Well, I'll tell you when I give up the drums and begin writing folk songs with my acoustic guitar."

"Deal."

"You have to tell me when you begin writing those pop songs though."

She giggled in response, it was all he needed really.

Edited by user 20 September 2011 10:28:05(UTC)  | Reason: Not specified

UserPostedImage


I feel numb, born with a weak heart
I guess I must be having fun


EARN BY WORKING LIKE A DOG
SPEND LIKE ROYALTY
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RoseJapanFan on 05/08/2011(UTC), infinite135 on 20/09/2011(UTC)
Offline C4AJoh  
#2 Posted : 04 August 2011 16:21:29(UTC)
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OOC: I liked it, it's a good mix of emotions from the 3 different parts. I also really liked the We could be the next Brandon and Hannah part lol that was funny. Good stuff :)

Edited by user 04 August 2011 19:09:45(UTC)  | Reason: Not specified

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DistortedAudio on 20/09/2011(UTC)
Offline Matticus  
#3 Posted : 04 August 2011 18:58:52(UTC)
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Ooc: loved it :) I also quite like how you have built such a good story about your character who has cancer :) s'good stuff :)
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Other Acts Include: Parish (Michael Parish), Lucifer (James Francis), Cheating the System (Ethan Plyth, Tom Jolly, Ryan Wyler)
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DistortedAudio on 20/09/2011(UTC)
Offline genocidal king  
#4 Posted : 04 August 2011 19:15:49(UTC)
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Ooc: good start. I liked it. We don't get nearly enough djent references on here either :p
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DistortedAudio on 20/09/2011(UTC)
Offline Andre Gandra  
#5 Posted : 04 August 2011 21:27:26(UTC)
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OOC: It's on the checklist... LOL I like it very much
Characters

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I was gone for a while, but I'm back (not that you care about LOL)
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DistortedAudio on 20/09/2011(UTC)
Offline DistortedAudio  
#6 Posted : 04 August 2011 23:56:56(UTC)
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OOC: Thanks for the feedback everyone.

@C4A: The shout-outs were fun to write.

@Matticus: Thanks very much, the cancer storyline should be pretty normal compared to other stuff.

@GK: TesseracT, Periphery and Meshuggah. Your DJENT reference needs have been sated.

@Andre: Thanks, the checklist is quite important to the storyline.
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I feel numb, born with a weak heart
I guess I must be having fun


EARN BY WORKING LIKE A DOG
SPEND LIKE ROYALTY
Offline DistortedAudio  
#7 Posted : 05 August 2011 04:04:50(UTC)
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"So, cancer huh?"

"Yep."

"That's screwed up man."

"Yeah."

Gary looked at the young vocalist who was gunning for his spot. He didn't really want to do these auditions but he had to be sure of one thing. He had to complete his checklist, all twenty items. It was going to be hard and it was going to be lame but he had to do it.

"OK..." The young vocalist started again as he began to strum his guitar, "This one's called 'My Kingdom for a Nail'!"

---

"I can't believe it, he's actually making me participate in these try-outs."

"Just calm down, it's gonna be cool."

"It's the nerve man, I'm gonna have to call Mariah...I need good luck."

"You're actually going to call your girlfriend for good luck? Laaaaaaaame. Lamer than lame. God you're lame."

Greg frowned.
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I feel numb, born with a weak heart
I guess I must be having fun


EARN BY WORKING LIKE A DOG
SPEND LIKE ROYALTY
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infinite135 on 20/09/2011(UTC)
Offline DistortedAudio  
#8 Posted : 20 September 2011 10:26:47(UTC)
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I’m Not Dead, Just Dying
Chapter 2:
Comatose


“You awake?”

“Of course, I am. Where am I?”

“The hospital mate, you’ve been out for like three weeks.”

“I have...? Did we finish the E.P. Paul?”

“Gary, you’re really in no shape to finish anything. The doctor said you’ve gotta stay in bed. Three weeks of your life mate, gone like that.”

“I didn’t finish the list Paul.”

“They don’t matter, just stay down.”

“Didn’t finish it...”

---


Gary Finch had been drifting in and out of a Coma for the last three weeks. During a recording session for Gears of Bremen’s ‘Chest Cavity Full of Lead’ E.P, he fell unconscious. Since then, the other four members of Bremen had been taking turns watching their beloved friend. For the first time in weeks, each get to talk to him...knowing this might be the last time they ever get the chance.

Paul:


“I gotta call the rest, they gotta know you’re up.”

“Yeah, call ‘im.”

“Christ.”

“It was colorful Paul.”

“What was colorful?”

“Where I went, the entire place. It wasn’t filled with fire, it wasn’t clouds either. It was a field, Cherry Blossoms lifting through the air and I wasn’t alone...”

“You weren’t alone?”

“My memories were with me. I relived every moment of my life, I think I did. That three weeks...was twenty years for me. All over again, and I do it all again in a heartbeat.”

“Jesus H. Christ Gary, it’s the morphine talking ain’t it? They said they’re feeding it to ya to relieve the pain.”

“I don’t hurt physically Paul, just emotionally. Got a few people I need to say sorry to.”

---


Renee


“You look like complete and utter shit.”

“I always do.”

“Never before like this Gary.”

“I’m sorry Renee.”

“Sorry for what? You’ve been unconscious for three weeks, what ‘ave you got to be sorry for?”

“For letting you wait seven years, for forgetting what to say seven years ago. This band has been caught up with fuck-ups, it’s kinda how we roll, I get that but I...I can’t stand for it any longer. Hell, I can’t fucking stand at all.”

“Calm down Gary.”

“I can’t calm down! I’m fucking dying! It took me a while to get the full gravity of it but I’m DYING! I’m getting colder Renee! I’m getting colder...”

“Gary, you gotta stay calm.”

“I’m sorry Renee, for not saying what I should have...a long time ago.”

“I think I should go Gary.”

“...yeah.”

---


Winston


“Gary you old dog, you look better than I used to.”

“Thanks Winston, you’ve been lots of help.”

“Glad to have been old boy, glad to have been.”

“Your brother is a weird one.”

“He’s been on edge since we moved out to Alaska, not to mention the whole try-out thing.”

“Had to make sure he was ready.”

“Yeah, suppose you did. Remember back when we first started out in Seattle?”

“Yeah.”

“We played that show at the Cafe, Rock Water Cafe and the owner yelled at you and me. ‘YOU CAN’T HAVE THAT MANY AMPS IN HERE!’ Remember what you said?”

“ ‘Well, I guess you’ve never had any real bands.’ “

“Yeah, haha! You always used to do shit like that, shit that me and Renee were scared to do. Shit that Paul would never dream of, like that time we played at the Lodge.”

Silence.

“Yeah, ha! You just looked straight at the owner...and told him right off.”

Silence.

“Right off, couldn’t believe that was my band leader right there...”

Silence.

“So, that’s it huh old boy? What’s it look like?”

Silence.

“Can’t wait for it then...can’t wait.”

A flat beep begins.

beeeeeeeep---


Gary


Gary’s eyes had closed for the final time, and for ten seconds, he had kept breath within his soul. For those ten seconds before his final gasp, he wasn’t on this plane, nor that of death. For those ten seconds...he was somewhere else. Somewhere safer. A somewhere, that made ten seconds seem like a lifetime. Gary Finch had lived two lived times, and in both, he died with a smile.

Although, in the other he may have died with a caste of 20 children, but that is a story for another day, and another reality. In this reality, Gary leaves behind not only four bandmates but a cascade of ideas and creativity.

How will Bremen handle it? Good question.
UserPostedImage


I feel numb, born with a weak heart
I guess I must be having fun


EARN BY WORKING LIKE A DOG
SPEND LIKE ROYALTY
thanks 3 users thanked DistortedAudio for this useful post.
RoseJapanFan on 20/09/2011(UTC), Laurelles1 on 20/09/2011(UTC), erich hess on 21/09/2011(UTC)
Offline RoseJapanFan  
#9 Posted : 20 September 2011 10:30:23(UTC)
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OOC: That was sad...lol. Good job :)
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"My God! We truly are a talented bunch. The fact that we write entire albums all on our own while the biggest stars in the world have 45 co-writers on ONE track?? Where the hell are OUR record deals and GRAMMYS?" -BrownSugar



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DistortedAudio on 20/09/2011(UTC)
Offline DistortedAudio  
#10 Posted : 20 September 2011 10:37:05(UTC)
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Originally Posted by: RoseJapanFan Go to Quoted Post
OOC: That was sad...lol. Good job :)


OOC: Thank you very much! I'm trying hard to find a new Face-Claim for GoB and expect a new website soon as well.
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I feel numb, born with a weak heart
I guess I must be having fun


EARN BY WORKING LIKE A DOG
SPEND LIKE ROYALTY
Offline infinite135  
#11 Posted : 20 September 2011 10:52:30(UTC)
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OOC: Fucking hell, that was an amazing read. You've got to be one of the best writers on the forum; your way of focusing on dialogue gives you a really unique style as well. After reading this, I could see Gary Finch sort of becoming the Syd Barrett of Gears of Bremen. An enigmatic figure who leaves his bandmates too soon, and haunts the music and image of his former band for the rest of their careers. Just my own personal interpretation, haha. Once again; fantastic job, man!
Kid Anything- Indie/Britpop/Shoegaze; influenced by Sigur Ros, XXYYXX, Kanye West, Blur, Oasis

(Bringing together an eclectic group of influences, Ulysses' songs are sung with carefree abandon by Nick Junk)

Kurt Ulysses - Songwriter, Guitarist, Backup Vocalist
Nick Junk - Vocals, Mojo



Infinite- Alternative/Experimental Rock; influenced by Muse, Radiohead, and The Beatles

(Known best for their experimental music and their frontman's eccentric behavior, the band disbanded after Eric Quillington's death to pursue solo careers or, in Matt Robert's case, peace of mind. Infinite released four albums over the course of their career; Blue Nebula, Midnight Skies, Insomnia, and Dancing about Architecture.)

Eric Quillington (Deceased) - Lead Vocals, Lead Guitar, Piano, Primary Lyricist
Matt Roberts - Bass
Greg Oldson - Drums, Backup Vocals, Secondary Lyricist
Amelia Florentine - Keyboards, Piano, Lyricist, Backup Vocals

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"When asked 'how do you write?' I invariably answer, 'one word at a time', and this answer is invariably dismissed. But that's all it is. It sounds too simple to be true, but consider the Great Wall of China, if you will: one stone at a time, man. That's all. One stone at a time. But I've read you can see that motherfucker from space without a telescope."

- Stephen King
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DistortedAudio on 20/09/2011(UTC)
Offline DistortedAudio  
#12 Posted : 20 September 2011 11:21:52(UTC)
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Originally Posted by: infinite135 Go to Quoted Post
OOC: Fucking hell, that was an amazing read. You've got to be one of the best writers on the forum; your way of focusing on dialogue gives you a really unique style as well. After reading this, I could see Gary Finch sort of becoming the Syd Barrett of Gears of Bremen. An enigmatic figure who leaves his bandmates too soon, and haunts the music and image of his former band for the rest of their careers. Just my own personal interpretation, haha. Once again; fantastic job, man!


OOC: Thank you very much man. I've been trying to improve my writing and I excised the action sequences(movement etc.) because it took place in a close-quarter location. I try to make a clear-line between Gears and Book of Love. With Gears having darker stories and BoL have light-hearted stories.
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I feel numb, born with a weak heart
I guess I must be having fun


EARN BY WORKING LIKE A DOG
SPEND LIKE ROYALTY
Offline Mouschi  
#13 Posted : 20 September 2011 23:56:12(UTC)
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OOC : Beautiful writing. I liked how each person talked to him in turn, and the finish was brilliant - very sad, but happy at the same time in a way. Well done.
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ooc info : debikzification
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DistortedAudio on 21/09/2011(UTC)
Offline Laurelles1  
#14 Posted : 21 September 2011 00:59:11(UTC)
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Ooc: That was really, astoundingly good. It always makes me happy to see that this forum has got such good writers. Brilliant, well done.
Awards (stroking myself and thinking I'm superior):
@Chaos awards:
Best Band - Mind
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Best Solo Male - Jason Smith
Birdies:
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DistortedAudio on 21/09/2011(UTC)
Offline Mckenzie-  
#15 Posted : 21 September 2011 01:18:11(UTC)
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OOC: IMPRESSIVE! Loved reading it. I always like the story's on this forum and this one is no different, it is brilliant! The final paragraph is also fantastic, i love they way you described his death albeit it is sad!

Edited by user 21 September 2011 06:25:18(UTC)  | Reason: Not specified

retired x
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DistortedAudio on 21/09/2011(UTC)
Offline DistortedAudio  
#16 Posted : 21 September 2011 05:07:45(UTC)
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@All, thanks to everybody for reading and feedback. Makes me feel all warm and respiratory inside.

@McKenzie: Yeah, his death scene was written after I started playing Eternal Sonata, really helps out my writing and should help out anyone's.
@Laurelles: Danke!
@Mouschi: I had to split it up, gave it a better format IMO. Thank you!
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I feel numb, born with a weak heart
I guess I must be having fun


EARN BY WORKING LIKE A DOG
SPEND LIKE ROYALTY
Offline Andre Gandra  
#17 Posted : 21 September 2011 05:44:49(UTC)
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OOC: too much dramatic for me... but it is really well written and very touching, good job!
Characters

Magie Lena
Abie Lena
Julia Volkova
mISTER_b
Groove In Downtown

I was gone for a while, but I'm back (not that you care about LOL)
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DistortedAudio on 21/09/2011(UTC)
Offline DistortedAudio  
#18 Posted : 21 September 2011 05:48:43(UTC)
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Originally Posted by: Andre Gandra Go to Quoted Post
OOC: too much dramatic for me... but it is really well written and very touching, good job!


OOC: Haha, I guess it doesn't appeal to everyone. Thanks!
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I feel numb, born with a weak heart
I guess I must be having fun


EARN BY WORKING LIKE A DOG
SPEND LIKE ROYALTY
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