"see,i dont think you could. there just isnt enough non microwave popcorn in a typical grocery store." lyida tells nina as the two turn towards serenity's house.

"well...maybe,but i think it's your best bet for an improvised explosive that wouldnt hurt anyone." nina says seriously as she parks her car outside serenity's home. the pair had gotten into a debate over living in a g rated fallout universe and naturally the conversation turned to blowing things up. vinegar and baking soda were not an option as that would be too simple.

nina and lydia hop out of the car,carrying armfuls of chips,dip,beef jerky,soda,and oodles of dog treats. the dog treats were lydia's doing. nina was ok with dogs,but didnt want to encourage the creatures more than they already were. nina doesnt bother locking the car. for one,it looks safe enough in serenity's area,and two..the car was an older jaguar xj, but not old enough to be classic or even desirable. so it just sorta blended in with the background.

" doorbell or knock? in any case,the dogs will probably go apeshit. " lydia asks nina.

nina shrugs and presses the doorbell. "texting "we're here" is tacky,love. we need to keep the doorbell makers in business."

"serenity!" the pair say in unison, its a little know fact that being able to speak in unison is actually in the job description when joining the harlots. they were excited to see her since really hitting it off at the valentine's party. plus,it was a nice change from hanging out with the same people all the time.

"dogs!" lydia squeals,shoving what she was carrying into nina's arms and stoops down to pet the animals,throwing caution to the wind. it wouldnt be the first time she was bitten by dog. the woman seemed to have little regard for her own safety when living things were involved. "oh i just adore the names!" she says as much to the dogs as to serenity. "i brought treats for them. the meaty ones. " she pipes up.

"cute dogs,love." nina says while looking from serenity to lyida. " we brought stuff as we didnt want to arrive empty handed aside from doggie treats. also,nice to see we all dressed for this." nina grins. she had on pink pajama pants with rubber ducks on them and a white shirt. lydia had on nightmare on elm street pjs. the shirt was patterned after freddie's sweater. she had hot cash from all the hair dye she bought and dammit,she was going to use it.
the two enter serenity's home and look around,rather impressed.

"lovely." nina says with a nod. "where can i put this all down,love? i think i have been designated pack mule..."

"um...pups,nina. pups." lydia says with a gesture of her hand.

ooc: we've let more expire than we've ever spent.

"it comes with being a harlot,love. join the band and suddenly you are mentally linked with the hive mind." nina says with a smirk to serenity's question. this wasnt exactly untrue. their communal living did have a purpose:it let the band improvise at shows with everyone always being on the same page. "i'll let lyds handle the dog greeting. she totally is a a dog person." nina says to serenity before scratching a passing dog behind the ear.

"they are so fucking cute!" lydia screeches while basking in the joy of the dogs taking to her. "my little goblin is a damned asshole. he doesnt like anyone but me. he wont bite,he'll just stay far away and stare...in the most judging way." lydia says with a giggle. she had no urge to ever have kids but her little dog was treated like one. she was definitely the sort to die and leave everything to her pet.

"gossip?" nina says with a scoff. "wouldnt know the first thing about that. but i did hear a certain someone went on a date with ryan ross hernandez. someone i'd NEVER expect." nina laughs while pointing a floppy slim jim at serenity. nina waddles under the heft of the snacks and treats they had brought and sits them on the table. "christ." she utters as box of hot chocolate mix falls to the floor,she bends over and snatches it up before placing it firmly on the table. " we'll let you serve the drinks,love. it'd look like we have problems if we just start drinking from the bottle."

"daiquiris!" lydia calls from under a pile of dog.

"you get on that,love. i dont know anything about fruity drinks."

"oh,they are just fantastic. you guys will love it." lydia replies while giving the dogs some last minute pets.

" i am in the mood for something cheesy,loves. some thick ass lasgana that weighs like a ton of bricks." nina suggests.

"we probably could use your star power,love. " nina cackles. the harlots were one of the longest lived rock acts in the business,but also one of the least successful. being a rock act,their time in the sun had long passed. the band had their crowd and played to it. that being said,there was no way they would ever win a best band award. especially since their best years were behind them anyway.


"thats the truth. how could a band that has been around so long and with such prolific personalities still be only queens of the underground? ." lyda says as she grunts to stand. she gives the dogs one last and lingering pet before joining her friends in conversation. she had no delusions of fame when joining the band,so this was more observation than complaint.

"probably because we dont do shit. we'e more of a live band experience." nina laughs to lydia. "not like our friend here. congrats on the nomination for an award,love." nina tells serenity warmly. the woman was a veteran like themselves,so it was nice to see her up for recognition. nina bends over and pats a dog's side gently. " im more of a i'll let other people have the pets person. with as much as we used to be on the road,i just never had the interest. so maybe fish? they are the least likely to bite." she giggles as she pats the dog again. "even though these little babies are just dandy." she says more to the dogs in a baby talk voice.

lydia lights up at the idea of a third dog around. but doesnt want to wake it up. she is the sensible sort,the sort that does anything possible not to wake a sleeping animal. "i made the same mistake with goblin. turn them into a princess and they never forget." she says in a more quiet tone,so that she doesnt wake the dog. lydia takes a spot behind the table and makes herself to home. she loudly grinds ice in the blender and gets the fruit ready for the daquiris. " serenity, we better not have to be the ones to tuck you into bed! " she jokes at the prospect of them getting beyond drunk tonight. "i mean,we will,but its bad form." she teases.

nina takes her spot on a chair as lydia plays bartender. "oh and garlic bread...the italians know how to cook." she swoons in hunger.

"we're going to need heavy sustenance." lydia grins,bringing a small tray with the drinks and some of the snacks over. "i may have put far too much rum in these. " she shrugs with a smirk. " you may be an artist,serenity,but we....well,theres a reputation to upold."

" well,the colours we can manage,love. But where do you stand on nuts vs no nuts M&M's?" Nina asks while pretending she's writing this all down. "And don't get fancy with the fudge or pretzel filled ones. We all like nice things,sure. But this is a punk rock band after all." She warns with a firm,yet imaginary click of a pen.

"Nina! That's a rather personal question so early in the evening." Lydia scolds nina while taking a test sip of a drink.

" Perhaps or maybe you're just that damned good. " Nina tells serenity. " We'll all have to wear our finest.i don't want to be caught looking like a street urchin when the camera cuts to you." She laughs warmly. She thought Serenity had a good chance. Even though there was lots of Joshua Grimmie, Ryan Ross hernandez,and radio vine to overcome.

"Can you imagine being the person who was bitten by a guppy? A really ill tempered guppy that draws blood?" Lydia shrieks with laughter at the idea and then makes what can best be described as what the jaws theme would sound like on a recorder. "That's totally someone who shouldn't be trusted."


"I'm a bit out of practice,love. So you may have to tuck me in. We all have been good eggs since being off the road. " Nina giggles while making a face after taking a sip. " Christ lyds,you like some strawberry with your rum? "

"Oh don't be a baby." Lydia teases nina while drinking. " Serenity here says she is going to drink us under the table. you're going to just take that?!" Lyida throws a packet of slim jims at nina.

"serenity with the nuts." nina says with a dirty smirk. "i suspected,but didnt expect you just to come out and say it. there it is then. nuts for serenity." she says with a matter of fact tone and slight nod of her head. what was a sleepover without a little dirty chatting? a not very good sleepover,thats what. "i go british with my sweets,love. all about the jaffa cakes. chocolate and orange just go so well together. "

"i love the bastard cousins of M&M's,the reese's piece." lydia says seriously,as if this is a topic that needs the utmost pondering. "one of my first instagram posts as a harlot? with ET. only because he's a fellow reese's pieces enthusiast." she says while moving her glass to punctuate each word.

"serenity as band mascot would certainly help our image. we could probably switch you out for chloe and nobody could tell. not like anyone could see her short ass behind the drums anyway." nina suggests while mimicking someone reaching way above their head to swing a drum stick.

"she looks like even more of a small child than erica. i swear,nina and i look like we are a couple that adopted two strange kids." lydia says while shaking her head. she hadnt really given it much thought before joining the band,but erica and chloe were far shorter than she expected.

"you better shout us out,love. we are not above going on culture uncut and talking about how you're too big for us now.how were just members of the pile of little people you crawled on to get that award." nina warns before giggling. the idea of a non sweet serenity was just too funny. though nina had no doubts serenity could get the claws out if need be,but she hadnt seen anything but professionalism from her.

"oh! we could be interviewed and they'd just show our silhouettes and disguise our voices. " lydia says excitedly. her being a dog person was rather clear,she sort of behaved like a dog in that she wore her excitement on her sleeve. "i dont know what got into her,but serenity just forgot all about us after the fca's. in fact,she spat on my mom and gave my parakeet the finger." she says the in deep and slow voice.

"one can take their disney love too far. if a car has a walt life,or annual passholder sticker? theyre going to drive slow. i just cant accept that." nine explains as if this was scientific fact.

"ooh. my disney favorite is chesire cat from alice in wonderland." lydia pipes up brightly. serenity was correct. everyone should at least like one disney thing. even if they are a terrible evil corporation that one day will own all media. some of their stuff is good.

"doesnt surprise me,hot topic." nina says with exaggerated tiredness. she and erica never tired of calling lydia hot topic. it started the first time they saw her and just kinda stuck. lydia replies merely by sticking out her tongue. "the actor is a dick and the movie itself isnt very good,but i gotta go with hades from hercules. that's a sleazy bastard i can see ruling the underworld. even if he is fucking shit at it. how could he NOT KNOW that his minions failed to kill hercules? overseeing the dead is kinda what hades does." nina fumes. the plot hole always irritated her,how did no one at disney not see that?!

"hades seems pretty hot topic to me." lydia quips into her glass while stifling a laugh and winking at serenity. " ok. we're all too cool and punk rock for disney,but....whats yours?" she asks in her best talk show host voice.

"oh i am so hungry, i cant wait." nina says pulling her shirt up to expose her stomach. " you can see my ribs,i am just wasting away." she takes a few chips to hold her over so that she doesnt expire right then and there. "depends on how bad,love. we talking the room,or the incredibly strange creatures who stopped living and became mixed up zombies?" nina asks,loudly biting a single chip.

"when i wear a t shirt that says that to your next show,dont be shocked. i will make it my business to ensure everyone clocks me and starts chanting it." nina warns. serenity had invited them into her life. these situations should be expected now. if nina wasnt so content to sit back and live off royalties,she would definitely make a song about the nut topic. at the mention of not being sure on the chocolate and orange front,nina looks apalled. she just assumed everyone had tasted the combination before. "oh,love. it is so divine. you have the sweetness of the chocolate and THEN you get the sweet and tart of the orange jelly-" she starts,clearly gearing up to breathing heavy like a fat cat before she is interrupted by lydia.

"jelly? ew. dont fall for this scam,serenity. this is probably some nasty stuff." lydia says looking disgustted.

"you love gummy stuff!" nina protests,shaking her drink for a refill. if lydia was playing bartender,she was going to take advantage of it.

"gummy is NOT jelly." lyida says firmly. she stands to get the refill for nina. reluctantly. "i'm only doing this because i dont want serenity feeling like she has to keep you topped off as hostess. and get bent with your orange jelly." lydia says,giving the finger to nina and heading back to the kitchen. in a few moments of grinding and pouring sounds,she returns with fresh drinks for all. "but you're forgetting the thin candy shell with the pieces. that little crunch lets you know whats coming up next...peanut butter and chocolate goodness. now i am not taking anything away from the cups. ESPECIALLY the big ones.they're wrong,but feel so right." lydia says with equal conviction that she is making great counter points to serenity's anti reeses pieces stance. then she lights up with the look of someone who thought up something that could easily bring peace to the middle east. "whoa...think about it. a reeses cup..BUT with the thin shell of the pieces." she lets her words hang in the air before clapping her hands once and leaning back in her chair with a smug look of self satisfaction.

"i would love to know if you had any enemies." nina says,giving a nod of thanks to lydia before continuing. "if you get any enemies,let us know. we will totally slag them off in all the cool clubs. granted,we dont play big venues,but the harlots have the ear of the cool people. serenity's enemies will never sit at the cool table." nina grins . she didnt have much pull,but the harlots still meant something in some circles. "i dont think i even have any enemies either. i dont have that exciting a life,i guess." she sighs dramatically but is happy to not have such worries. she and erica are extremely close,but she has no urge to be in the middle of everything like her friend.

lydia takes a sip and smirks. " i think i am just going to pick a random person and be like..hey,we're feuding now. um...lincoln. man,fuck that guy." she says in a very animated way.

nina shrugs and shakes her head. "ive never been to any disney park. just never found myself around one.

"oh disney world is the better one for sure. i dont know why,but its just something the air,you know. you can feel it when you walk in." lydia had been a few times and always had a ball. "that being said,i dont know how many times i could go in a single year. maybe,if i could be the only person in the park. i dont want to wait hours multiple times to ride space mountain. though....i'd do it for the haunted mansion." she replies thoughtfully

"dead and BAD parents. what was up with those nutters in frozen? who the fuck locks one of their kids up? nutjobs,thats who. the ice woman should have just returned and killed everyone. bloody movie was ok. at best." nina says in confusion. at least in rapunzel,the child was locked in a tower away from the family. she never got why the parents kept the kid in the castle,but still locked her up and lived their lives normally.

"little mermaid was poo. so much so that never remember a daughter." lydia says with conviction. "though i totally agree with you on ursula. her song is great too." lydia lights up again and nina looks over and shakes her head no. "disney sing along? " she says slyly while raising her drink and winking.

nina scoots forward and leans towards serenity. "The incredibly strange creatures who stopped living and became mixed up zombies is...well,love..its basically some guy made a sorta zombie movie around a carnival. but lots of the film is singers in a club and a terrible stand up comedian." she explains. it really was something one had to see to really understand,but it was so weird nobody usually sat through it. " some parts are kinda arty though. i do kinda have to respect the vision of ray dennis steckler. love."

"my mother and father run an iron and steel buisiness. my mother irons and my father steals." lyida says flatly. "these jokes had to be dated even when the movie was made." she says sourly.

"i will mail you some as soon as i get back to ol' blighty. unless you want to hit up the brit shops,love." nina suggests. there is a strong chance serenity will not like the treats,but it never hurts to check. " there is a version you can get in most any grocery stores stateside,pims. they come in orange..the best. and also raspberry. which i've never had because i am not a damned weirdo." nina says with a shake of disapproval. she didnt care for actual raspberry flavor. she preferred the completely artificial blue raspberry. "nonsense." nina replies at the mention of being given merch. "if your friends dont buy your stuff,nobody will." while she always appreciated the gesture,she was a person who worked in the arts. so many people wanted free stuff because they were your friends. when real friends should be the first paying customers one has.

"oh my god,you are so right! if i didnt just adore you and the fact so many witnesses saw me come here....." lydia trails off. serenity was correct,it was a fantastic idea and it was a miracle resses never thought of it. people had probably been killed for less. free energy? that pales in comparison to the perfect chocolate and peanut butter treat. that rivaled the better mouse trap that the old saying mentioned

"i think we can trust her,love. she doesnt even like reese's pieces." nina says with dramatic seriousness. if anyone was going to run to the reeses corp,it probably wasnt going to be serenity.

"oh i think you do!" lydia says,grabbing nina's arm. "oh my god,we HAVE to go! we have tooooooo." lydia couldnt think of a better way to finish off the tour that the harlots were going to be on. there was so much to see,do,and eat at disney. lydia hadnt had the pleasure of really traveling yet. her stint with the harlots was just starting and being a tour guide in memphis,she was usually on the other side of the traveler experience. lydia really hits the peak of excitement at the mention of the halloween trip. " october. we have to go. though i think the good one is at universal studios. the disney one is mickeys not so scary halloween,but fuck if i dont love that one too." lyda loved halloween. in fact, her home looked a lot like a halloween store. those november 1'st sales pretty much birthed the decoration of her home.

"i did not know there was a tangled series. " nina says in quiet awe. "i'll totally look at when i get back home. i'll just say its for takara." nina giggles and smirks. that was the beauty of young children being around,one could always watch cartoons and have company while doing so. nina points to serenity's empty glass and lydia hops to action. drunk disney sing alongs were the best sing alongs. " right,i am going to say no singing let it go. i lived with small children during the height of that. i will either kill you guys or myself if i have to hear that song."

lydia returns with more drinks. she finally decided to just put the frozen,and already mixed daiquiris in the freezer. it was quicker and she didnt think anyone would mind non freshly made drinks now. "that movie has been known to kill people,nina." she warns.

"its a challenge,serenity. it's..." nina sighs and shakes her head.

this trailer makes it look so much better than it actually is.

ooc:wots three days to the eternity we've been here?

"first one's free,kid." lydia sneers in the tone of the anti drug progam's promised drug dealers that were supposed to lurk around ever corner,but never actually did. "i see your plan,but i am totally falling into it. "this is a great house and you are really sweet and all....even if you still have my shoes. but how much are we looking at here? i'm not like nina. i've only been in the harlots since the pandemic,i dont even have a tour under my belt." she exclaims while taking out her phone and bringing up the calculator.

"oh,lyds, we got you. you'll just have to work off the difference in the harlots' salt mines." nina grins at her bandmate. before turning to serenity. "i'll be your guide through all things jaffa and cadburys. they are so much more thant those godawful eggs you lot get here in the states. " nina wasnt sure,but the only cadbury;s product she had ever seen in the usa were the creme egges. which she absolutely loathed. not only was the creme vile looking,it tasted terrible too. "we'll also get you set up with tea and a kettle. microwaving the water for tea will get you killed in some circles,love. not about to let that happen to you.

"ooh,blueprints" lydia says while rubbing her hands together conspiratorially. if there was one thing that made some minor heist sound major,it was the mention of blue prints. " we'll need to keep you around. i totally failed drafting and have no idea how to read blueprints. " lydia thoroughly enjoyed the cackle of serenity. it was both witch like and warm. truly the most dangerous of all cackles.

"oh my god,dont book us in the viking hotel. " nina exclaims while biting some beef jerky. " place looks bloody cool,but can be....well,bloody. i read something about someone taking the sheet off the mattress and there was a fucking huge blood stain on it. like,serious crime level blood stain." nina warns very firmly. while she was born and raised in whitechapel,violence and bloodshed were not unknown to her,but she wasnt the same street urchin she once was.

"oh we have to stay inside disney. do this proper." lydia says with a bit of drunken swagger. "the Polynesian resort for sure. i think they have still have the tiki room."

"you are drunk!" nina giggles while pointing at lydia. lydia probably had the lowest tolerance of the harlots. for better or worse,she hadnt had a life time of almost deadly levels of intake under her belt. it probably was best that serenity liked planning. nina and lydia were both the sort to take off and worry about details later.

" that sounds amazing." lydia nods and sips her own drink. " i never been married,but i am not going to calm down once a ring is on this finger." lydia says while holding up her ring finger. it was proudly bare. while she did consider herself sort of involved with someone,she was never getting married. " lady,dont ever give up your frying pan." lydia cackles.

"yeah. never get married,loves." nina says simply. she was married once to castor of vile hour. she tried to fit the mold of a married woman and mother,but it just wasnt her. she felt owned and hated it. marriage,or perhaps castor,made her feel dirty about her past. she occasionally missed the step daughter she tried her best to be a mother to,but it was clear from the get go that she was an outsider to that relationship.

"why thank you, my drink making skills were good enough to get a c." lydia giggles to her friends. she was the sort that tried many things in life. anything that wasnt a quote unquote real job: a clown,a bartender, car customizer,bee keeper,chainsaw sculptor,fire dancer,finally tour guide for sun studios in memphis. lydia had worn many hats and had many random skills under her belt.


ooc: that viking hotel bit is based in fact. i always wanted to stay there in orlando,but it has some shady reviews. i believe its closed now.

Edited by user 27 March 2021 13:23:50(UTC)  | Reason: Not specified